It seems like everyone these days is discussing the virtues of corporate values. Me included. Values help guide the organization and its leadership. They help customers and potential employees decide if they want to do business with you. They are who you are. However, in a still fragile job market, many employees ignore and tolerate values that are not authentic.
If you’ve read my blogs before, you know that I prefer nice (Nicely Me). Not squishy, wishy-washy nice, but kind. I get passionate about treating people with dignity and kindness, and I dislike the whole mean, but talented, hard-working girl syndrome. Being mean in order to blow off some steam because you work so hard, is not okay.
I say mean girl (or guy) syndrome is perpetuated at the top. It is the leader’s responsibility to set the tone. If you have mean employees, that is a result of your leadership, or lack thereof. Here’s some evidence. I work with lots of people managers. During a leadership meeting of about 40, I saw one young leader rolling her eyes while one of the organization’s top leaders was speaking. I can’t say for sure if this young leader’s behavior affects her department; however, I learned recently that a fine employee walked off the job in less than two weeks, citing ostracizing behaviors from the other employees.
Here are several possible indicators of a mean culture:
- Do you make excuses for mean team members because they work hard? Do you find yourself saying, “It’s hard work and a tough environment.” What does that really mean? Don’t confuse hard work and dedication with hard edges and negativity.
- Have you ever said “I can’t hire this person because they would be eaten alive.” There are times when candidates are not a cultural fit.
- Does your organization have a rite of passage? In other words, do new employees have to run the gauntlet to prove themselves to other employees?
- Do you have a vague on-boarding process? Do new employees know who they can ask questions of and who will give them direction. While this doesn’t seem overtly mean, it can be insensitive in not providing new employees enough information to help them feel empowered and makes them dependent on other employees
There are certainly others, and maybe you would like to contribute a story about your experience with mean in the workplace. I really want to discuss what you would do about it.
First off, do you really know what the workplace culture experience is like for new employees? Have you asked them? Do people leave early on? Have you asked other employees outside of the department?
If you determine that you have a bit of mean going on, stop it, don’t reward it. Reward the values and behaviors that you want to see and admonish the negative ones. Empower all employees to celebrate the great behaviors and to call out the bad ones in a compassionate way. You are the leader. You set the tone and frequency of negative or positive behaviors.